Pay the bill

Excuse me, the check, please. Thanks. Okay, let's split the check. Four of us, so... what? There's a service charge? For four people? Okay, fine.

Wait, no. It's on me tonight. It's my birthday... no, it's not my birthday. But it's on me! Oh, the card machine is down? Of course it is. Anyone got cash?

Excuse me, can we pay separately? Thanks.

Cash or card? Card for me, cash for my grandma. Her tea is my treat, though. No, Grandma, don't argue. And keep the change, please. It's only ten cents. I'm a big spender!

Sorry, Ben, I forgot my wallet. How much do I owe you? Twelve dollars? I'll pay back every cent tomorrow. Promise.

Here's my share of the cab, too. Wait, the waiter is bringing a cake. We didn't order that. It's on the house? Because I'm so polite? Best day ever. Ben, I owe you nothing!

There's no menu. Only a QR code on the table. Okay, I scan it, and the app opens. Order, done. Now I pay by app.

Declined? What? My card is declined? I had money yesterday! Hold on. Oh. I paid for last night's pizza. Nobody tell my bank. Try again... Yes! Okay. Coffee is on its way.

Okay, the total is $84. Is the tip included? Yes? Okay. Seven of us. Let's work out how much each. That's twelve dollars each.

Or we go Dutch, and Kemal pays extra, because he had the steak. And the wine. And the dessert. Kemal? Kemal! Where are you going?

Okay, everyone, let's chip in for Sarah's present. It's sixty dollars, and there are six of us. That's ten dollars per person. Easy!

Hi, are you the cashier? Is the gift box included? Yes? Great. Do you want to round up for charity? Sure, round up, please. Is it worth it? A mug for sixty bucks? Well, she loves tea. Yes, it's worth it.